“The ramblings and grumblings of author Ad Hudler”

Stay Away, Fay!
Monday, August 18, 2008

I know most of you come here every day to get a dose of laughter, but I'm not feeling very funny right now. I feel kind of cheated, like the time in first grade when T. S. (protecting identity here) said he'd invite me to his slumber party, and I got to school the next day and realized that he HADN'T!

I went to bed last night thinking we'd dodged Fay's bullet. The cone of probability for the tropical storm had shifted almost 70 miles westward, leaving Fay to do her whirling dervish impersonation over open water. Ahhhh, no problem. Good night, everyone.

Then I wake up and see that the damn thing has moved BACK into our path. So ... remember those kayaks I said I had tied up yesterday? Well, I was lying....I never got around to it because I didn't think I had to. But now, this morning, I will spend an hour outside, schlepping all those things inside that would otherwise get tossed through windows. And I will tie down the damn kayaks.

And I will stay glued to the weatherunderground.com site, charting the speed and direction of Fay until the POWER GOES OUT!!! (Not a big deal for a few hours, folks, but try SEVEN days ... as we experienced with Wilma ... and FIVE days, as we had with Charley) And then we will start sweating like pigs. And then the neighbors will all hang out on the street, enjoying the last of the ice in their cocktails as our un-plugged kids, with no gadget diversion available, resort to (gasp!) playing ditch'em or hide-n-seek, and they will be shocked at how much fun it is. And at night, my wife and I will lay in bed, our bodies sticky with sweat, and when one of us rolls over and runs into the other our skin will stick together like pieces of raw bacon. And we will be kept awake by the sound of frogs croaking and lizards scurrying about inside the house ... hijackers from the potted patio plants I had to bring inside.

But I am probably prematurely obsessing here. It is something I do. I figure if I worry about it enough then it won't happen ... if the Worry Gods see that I'm worried then they will protect me. This is very similar to the story I told you about how-I-keep-the-airplane-in-the-air. http://www.adhudler.com/blog/2008/07/why-delta-should-send-me-paycheck.asp.

I've always been a worry-wart. It drove my parents crazy. But more on this later. I've got to get the lawn furniture inside.


Blogger Kevin Pierce said...

Mmm, bacon.

August 18, 2008 at 2:17 PM  

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