“The ramblings and grumblings of author Ad Hudler”

My little nighttime secret ...
Thursday, September 11, 2008

In the past year I've heard secretaries and nurses in two different doctor's offices engage in conversations similar to this:

"I just couldn't get to sleep last night."


"I don't know. I was tired, but i just couldn't fall asleep. And I don't like to take that Tylenol P.M.; it makes me feel too groggy next day."

"Why not Benadryl?"

"For allergies?"

"No, for sleeping, honey."
. . . . . . .
Aha! So I'm not the only one who has made this fantastic discovery: that oval, bright-pink pill not only stops the sniffles but also can usher you into la-la land.

I mean, we all know that antihistamines can make you sleepy. I remember when my mom accidentally gave our 4-year-old an adult dose of Dimetap, and she slept for an entire day. ("Hello? Social Services?") But I had no idea that Benadryl had become such a mainstream sleeping aid. I've been asking several people if they know about it, and they look at me like, "Duh, Ad? Where have you been?"

I discovered its soporific effects by accident. I do have allergies, and when something in the air is causing that river of phlegm to run in the back of my throat I go to bed at night with two Benadryls, else I will choke to death.

Well, I noticed that I slept really well on those nights ... and then I started experimenting: some nights with no Benadryl, some nights with one and some with TWO! (Yeah. You guessed it. I'm now a 2-Benadryl man).

We humans are great at finding second uses for products intended for something else. I mean, we all know that Avon's Skin-So-Soft (my grandma's favorite fragrant bath oil) wards off mosquitoes. And that peanut butter gets gum out of hair and wool carpet. And that gargling with lukewarm ketchup cures a sore throat. (Just kidding; haven't tried that one. Yuck.)

My next potential discovery: My wife and I are convinced that eating raw muscadine grapes provokes horrific nightmares. I'm serious. Try this, and let me know.

GIN COUNT for Sept. 10: Nothing to brag about last night, folks. I had a gin-and-tonic with four ounces gin, followed by a 4-ounce gin-with-lemon-and-bitters. Incidentally, the latter drink is called a "pink gin," named for the color it gets from the dash of Angostura bitters. I learned of the drink through a Graham Green novel. But I will NOT be calling it a pink gin because well ... it makes me sound like a girl, now, doesn't it? ("Yes, I'll have a pink gin, please, and stop smiling like that or I'm gonna KICK YOUR ASS!")


Anonymous Anonymous said...

Geez, Ad. Do you ask for an umbrella when you have a pink gin?

By the way, the active ingredients in pure sleeping pills (not tylenol or advil pm (tm)) and benadryl is exactly the same. And, generally speaking, the sleeping pills are cheaper. So next time you have the sniffles from an allergy, take a sleeping pill.

September 11, 2008 at 3:51 PM  
Blogger Ad Hudler said...

Scott: yes, umbrellas a necessity!

Did y'all go to med school or somethin'?

September 11, 2008 at 10:31 PM  

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