“The ramblings and grumblings of author Ad Hudler”

Eye of the Tiger
Wednesday, January 26, 2011

My high-school friend, Chalmers, invited me to his birthday party ... at a paintball park.

That's "Extreme Rage" written on top of this truck, which was the park's name until it recently was changed to "Oasis Paintball Park." Hilarious 190-degree name-change, don't you think? Did the new mayor come in and say, "If you don't change that angry serial-killer name we're going to come in and shut you down?"

At any rate, I was totally excited ... until I was handed a gun and mask and it dawned on me that this was NOT laser tag but instead a game in which people would shoot paint-filled bullets at me.
Oh ... and it was in the woods. Full 360-degree exposure.
Oh ... and my glasses did not fit under the mask, so I couldn't see a damned thing.
The bruises don't last long, I was told. It didn't hurt THAT bad.

"How do I know who's on my team?" I said. Everyone looked alike: 17-year-olds in blue jeans and dark-colored shirts.

I found on the ground a long piece of plastic barrier tape. Bright pink. And I made everyone on my side tie a piece of it onto the barrel of their guns so I could tell they were on my side. "Okay," I said. "This is now officially the Susan B. Komen Shoot for the Cure."

In the end, I was the last standing member of my team ... probably because I took off running as fast as I could the second the bell went off to start the game. When I returned I found everyone in the "hit" holding pen and then realized it was up to me to win the game.

Except the only standing person on the other team was in a PAINTBALL UNIFORM! Hardcore dude with canisters of bullets around his belt.

Bang. I'm dead.


Blogger geeky Heather said...

Fluffy fingers! Fluffy fingers!! (Name that movie featuring paintball hijinks!)

January 26, 2011 at 11:52 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Little bit jealous here. It's something I've always wanted to do. Once.

January 26, 2011 at 11:53 AM  

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