“The ramblings and grumblings of author Ad Hudler”

Adventures of the Kindle Cowboy
Wednesday, March 30, 2011

I've told y'all before how I like to lie to strangers, trying on different identities.
Because I wear a cowboy hat, jeans and brown work boots those lies often involve made-up vocations of a rural nature.

Yesterday, while waiting for the aircraft door to open:
Flight attendant: Is this home?
Me: Yes.
FA: Where's your ranch?"
Me: Colorado. I commute between here and there.
FA: What do you have?
Me: What?
FA: How big of an operation?
Me: Uhmmmm, not too big. 200 acres maybe.
FA: No. How many head? And what kind?
Me: Uhmmmmm.....Head?
FA: Cattle?
Me: Yeah!
FA: What kind?
Me: Uhmmmmmm.
FA: Red angus, black angus, hereford. What kind?
Me: A good mix.
FA: Uh-huh. What's your favorite breed?
Me: Uhmmmm.
FA: I don't like those black angus. They're so aggressive, don't you think so?
Me: Uhmmmm. I don't really run the ranch. You see, it's my dad's, and he's not good with numbers, and I'm a CPA so I'm out there trying to help him.

Now I ask you .... what are the chances of running into a flight attendant who was raised on a cattle ranch in Wisconsin? Hmm?

Besides, they're not complete lies. As in most fiction, there are elements of reality in this made-up stuff: I did grow up in a ranch-and-farm town in Colorado, and a lot of my friends wore hats and boots and worked the land and herds. True, I was a townie; not a cowboy. It wasn't until age 45 when I started wearing cowboy hats, shortly after my doctor excavated the first scary mole from my bald head.


Anonymous Anonymous said...

The truth shall set you free!

March 30, 2011 at 1:33 PM  

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